The sexual lifestyle

"The gay lifestyle".

I know this isn't always said with malice, but that term just doesn't sit right with me. Just like "sexual preference", I guess my breathing preference is to inhale air instead of water or sand.

Anyway, here's some basic observations of what kind of lifestyle my gay friends have:

- Most have full time jobs in a professional occupation
- They are paying off a mortgage(s)
- They're healthy and don't take drugs
- They are family oriented
- They go to the movies and birthday parties
- They spend Christmas with loved ones
- They have mostly straight friends, considering most people on this planet are, and
- Some but not all are lucky enough to have someone to love and love them back in committed monogamous relationships.

This might be a little far fetched, or maybe I've been very lucky with my experience, but I'm struggling to distinguish the difference between this and the "straight lifestyle". I'm sure they have great sex lives, but I don't care to even ask my straight friends what they get up to in bed. Furthermore, I know of more straight people who get up to interesting activities, but again, its a proportional thing I'm observing I'm sure.

I know some of you reading this might think I'm making a fuss over nothing. For the sake of those who do use words to marginalise or those who are otherwise confused about a reality outside their personal experience, can't we stick to the term "sexual orientation"? After all, it is exactly what it suggests. A sexual orientation toward a gender or genders. It is not a choice or a style of life.

Of course some are convinced it is a choice, but I guess its hard to know unless your sexual orientation is geared toward the same sex. So really, it takes one to know whether one is choosing or not. Likewise, someone who is gay and has no inclination toward the opposite sex could just as easily conclude that all straight people are closeted homosexuals. Fortunately we live in a straight society so they are well educated through purely existing in it that this isn't the case.

I guess it is a straight society's consequence, creating a doubt as to whether something they don't see or personally experience exists. Most gay people keep their orientation to themselves, quite successfully. I guess their lifestyle doesn't come through quite enough to make it obvious.

-Forky